Writing Can Be Murder

June 5, 2007

My contribution to the world of art

Filed under: Uncategorized — jenniferelbaum @ 8:17 am

I have no artistic ability. None. Can’t draw, can’t paint, can’t knit, can’t crochet, can’t bead, can’t scrapbook, can’t play an instrument…you get the idea.

DH on the other hand can do pretty much anything. 

A couple weeks ago I bought some clay (two bucks at the supermarket, wasn’t like I was making a big investment in art supplies) thinking that maybe I could at least make a simplistic clay figure. Nope. I totally suck at it.

DH on the other hand sits down with me, grabs some clay, rolls it around and Voila! — a tree appears!  A short time later there’s a man sitting on a rock. (The man really pissed me off because I recognized him as a character from one of my books.)

I, on the other (meaning the untalented) hand, had made nothing.

We put the tree and the man away. I put the clay away for a week. Then, the other night, I took it back out again. Once again, I ended up with nothing. DH made a dog.

 I look at his man, and his dog, and his tree and I make my one warped contribution: “You should have the dog peeing on the tree.”

DH, who must love me very much because there’s no other worldly reason to put up with my insanity, lifts the dog’s leg. 

Then I finally figured out what even I could make. I rolled out some yellow clay.

Yup, I made the puddle of pee.



  1. LOL. Have you tried assembling? Because I bet you could be the next Christo. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christo_and_Jeanne-Claude

    But if you end up setting up a line of umbrellas around your house, your husband can’t blame me. 😉

    Comment by Kate Perry — June 5, 2007 @ 1:14 pm

  2. Hated the saffron gates they did in NYC a couple years ago. (Then again, I hate the color orange (think I posted that on your blog once) so they were already at a disadvantage with me, because saffron is just a shade of orange in my book.)

    Now the guy who wants to dye Mont Blanc red in order to create a pink state, sounds like my kind of artist, maybe he’ll let me help out…

    Comment by jenniferelbaum — June 5, 2007 @ 2:04 pm

  3. Yup, I made the puddle of pee.

    Well, they say God is in the details. 😉

    Comment by Jennifer Colgan — June 5, 2007 @ 4:25 pm

  4. Hmmm…I’ve always heard the Devil is in the details…

    Comment by jenniferelbaum — June 6, 2007 @ 9:11 am

  5. Art, like LIFE, is not complete without pee.

    Comment by Laura Green — June 13, 2007 @ 11:13 am

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